There is a countdown in my head. At the end of this countdown, I will return to the office.
I fear I will return wearing a Hefty trash bag accessorized by a bungee cord belt.
Why? Because it fits (they go all the way up to 55 gallon). And black is slimming.
I have steadfastly refused to buy any clothes for my post-pregnancy body. I am the "before" on any given episode of What Not to Wear. Sweat pants? Check. Oversized (though not nearly as "over" as I'd like) sweatshirt? Check.
My theory is that I will be more motivated to lose the weight with my clothes waiting for me. Only they aren't so much "waiting for me" as they are "mocking" me.
I guess I'm grateful that my extra fluff is due to having a baby. People tend to give you a free pass when it comes to post-baby weight. That and they really aren't all that interested in how I look when I'm holding a perfectly adorable bundle of baby boy cuteness.
Now, some of you might say that this is the perfect time of year for me to be battling baby weight, right? After all, it's a New Year. Make a resolution! Time for a new beginning!
Resolutions suck. Plus, I think carrying around a resolution adds a couple of pounds, so I'm better off without one. Are you following my logic?
I've lost weight before and know "how" to do it. I have a game plan that works. I just don't wanna play right now.
To my way of thinking, I should go back to my pre-pregnancy weight simply by eating what I ate pre-pregnancy. Right? I mean it was good enough then, why not now (even if I wasn't all that happy with my weight then)?
Only it's not working. I'm afraid it's going to require something drastic. Painful even.
Something like........I can't believe I'm saying this.......exercise. My fingers trembled a little just typing it.
I was planning to start walking with NR once it started getting warmer outside. I'll be honest. I thought I'd be back to my normal weight and would just need a little toning. Or maybe lose some bonus weight.
Yeah, that's not happening. Unless it doesn't start getting warmer until, say, July. I might be closer to my original weight by then.
So, I have to figure something out. I know. My "motivation" practically leaps off the screen.
I need ideas. Fun'ish workouts. I wish I had a workout partner, but my sis moved just far enough away that it's too inconvenient for us to workout together. I've tried to convince MotH to get a Wii, so that I can then get a Wii Fit (hey, it's cheaper then a gym membership and my sis is using it to lose her baby weight), but he wants to wait until we have money....bleh bleh bleh.
OH! I forgot to add a BIG (no pun intended) component to my approaching-manic need to lose weight. We just bought a boat. Nothing fancy, but it will require that I wear a bathing suit this summer (it's also the reason we don't have money for a Wii. MotH is busy fiddling with the stupid thing. I hope he enjoys his new prop while his big ol' wife traumatizes everyone from the bow of the SS Imperfect.).
So, in the interest of not scaring small children (mine or those of a perfect stranger), random fishermen or sun perch, I really must make some changes.
Or maybe I'll just wear the Baby Bjorn all summer and hope NR distracts everyone from looking too closely at mom.
2 years ago