Monday, October 20, 2008

35 Weeks......and thanks, I think

That was my ob's original goal for me.

As he told me, most women have "take home" kids at 35 weeks, so we are both jazzed that I made it to this particular milestone.

To be exact, I'm 35 weeks and 2 days.

I'd like this little man to keep baking a little longer (despite my gripings), but feel like I can relax a smidge.

He did tell me that my cervix (we're all grown-ups, right, so saying "cervix" shouldn't be a problem) wasn't doing a darn thing. I'm okay with that, I suppose (because the alternative is????), but it would be nice if I knew my body was at least heading towards the finish line.

He also told me, again, that the baby is measuring big. Then I went to a maternity chiropractor today and she was "feeling" baby and told me he was "pretty big for my gestation". So I evidently have an overachiever.

So that's my update, now on to the "thanks, I think" portion of the post.

My ob is, by far, my favorite doctor. He's been my doctor since MotH and I were newlyweds (so 13+ years) and it just a compassionate and caring doctor. He sat on my bed and cried with us after the twins were born and NOBODY wants this to be a successful pregnancy more then he does.

Today, however, he missed the mark. For a man that makes his living dealing with hormonal women, I would have expected him to be wiser.

He has delighted in pointing out how big I'm getting each time I go in. He's a little like AM. I can tell he honestly considers this to be a compliment.

So I'm sitting on the table today and he says "wow, you look so pregnant. It looks like you're having quads!".

Um, thanks?

How does one respond to such a "compliment"?

I just sat there stupidly and he quickly added "you know, compared to last time".

That's not really helping, buddy.

And because he apparently suffers from temporary short-term memory loss, he made his final pronouncement when I emerged from the room. He saw me come out and announced to his nurse (who had just given me MY LAST SHOT!!!!!!! and is well acquainted with my ample physique) "look at how big her belly is!".

I don't know if he had a delivery last night that made him lose sleep, but he certainly brought a big shovel to work with which to dig himself into a hole.

I just laughed, because I knew he wasn't saying it to tease me. He's just so tickled that I AM this big.

I, on the other hand, do not find this fact to be nearly as delightful as he apparently finds it. I suppose that's to be expected.

I left the office with my cervix closed and my ego in tatters.

But did I mention that I had my LAST SHOT TODAY???!!! If I was capable of doing so, I would do some sort of "end-zone" dance.

No, you can't watch.


Nurse Boy said...

Your doctor cracks me up! Kind of reminds me of all the times people would say I was "glowing" each time I was pregnant. That was OIL. My face was so greasy, you could have fried an egg on it. So gross!

Mrs. Nurse Boy

Imperfect Mom said...

I told someone that one time.

She told me I was just glowing with pregnant and I said "no, that's called oily skin". She looked so crushed that I never used that retort again, lol.